The Odyssey of Finding Pants
I never liked buying clothes. Before questioning my gender, I had a hard time finding girl’s clothes I liked, but I couldn’t even conceive the notion of buying in the men’s section (I had the binary well internalized). I kept looking for my own girl “style”, hoping to find something I felt comfortable wearing; altough being so picky made me feel superficial.
When I started identifying as trans, I realized that I couldn’t find my girl-style because I didn’t feel like a girl in the first place. I became suddenly aware of all the oh-so-comfortable, oh-so-me men’s clothes available — if I dared to buy it against my mother’s wishes.
When I finally plucked up the courage to go into a men’s store, I found an obstacle I hadn’t thought of: men’s clothes come in men’s sizes. I am only boy-sized, and thin to boot. I now know a couple of stores that sell extra-small T-shirts, and I can wear small shirts if necessary. Switching to boy shirts made me feel so much better. I could finally look at myself in mirrors without feeling my stomach twist.
Pants were a tougher issue. I have female-wide hips, but men’s pants are simply humongous on me. After months of wearing boy shirts, I still couldn’t find boy pants in my size. I went into store after store, feeling more and more frustrated, asking the store clerks for their smallest size. They were really nice; they tried to find something my size, and you could tell they didn’t want to send me to a kids’ store.
I couldn’t bring myself to go to a children’s shop: all of them have toddler-sized things in their windows. Why are there stores for teenage girls, but not for teenage boys? I mean, even boys need clothes when they aren’t kids anymore, but haven’t grown much either!
I ended up buying a huge pair of jeans out of desperation. They didn’t look too good on my thin legs, but I had to get out of my girl-fitting pants. I didn’t think I’d ever find anything my size — even T can’t do miracles (actually, T might make things worse, since it’ll melt my hip fat away!)
But, recently, a store clerk offered me a pair of extra-snug-fitting pants. And they fit! Maybe I wasn’t condemned to a no-pants life, after all. I had gotten really dramatic about the whole affair: I honestly thought there were no adult pants in my size. Now, I’m more optimistic: it might be harder to find clothes my size, but it isn’t impossible.
PS: Hudson’s FTM Guide includes a section on finding clothes for short and small guys.
¿De qué «hip fat» estades hablando? ¡Yo no creo que tengades un gramo de grasa en ese cuerpillo esquelético que habedes!
No parece, pero la poca grasa que tengo se acumula en lugares femeninos (caderas, muslos, traste… tetas!). (Y no, no te voy a mostrar; igual no creo que te interese mucho!)
Most of my boy-pants come from Old Navy, but recently my mum got me some pants in the largest size from the boys section in a department store in the mall and they fit quite well. Unfortunately, my favorite pants are the baggy kind with lots of pockets and chains, and I always have to roll them up and pin them. I wouldn’t be too upset over shopping in a kids store; I met a short, skinny bio-guy who said he has to shop there to get anything that fits, but it’s also cheaper.
I’m not in exactly the same situation (imagine my surprise when I turned out to be a Large Man by Jockey’s standards), but I still feel you on the difficulty of finding things for one’s body type. I have to stock up on jeans because apparently only one place in my immediate vicinity carries the ones I like (that can accommodate my girly hips while still being dudely, without being overly baggy).
I’m actually probably better off now than when I still bought anything (besides bras) in the women’s section, because I’m tall for a woman and many women’s shoes don’t come in my size.
Glad to hear you got something that you can wear!
Another idea, maybe it will help… my brother (a cis guy) was quite short and really skinny as a young teen. He could usually find good fitting pants at Land’s End. It’s kinda pricey but they last a long time. Maybe those would work for you.
Thanks for the suggestion, but there is no Land’s End or Old Navy in Argentina :)
Apparently, all sorts of people have trouble with finding clothes… I remember, before identifying as trans, I insisted that women’s stores had to carry masculine clothing. I guess shops just aren’t geared towards small markets (gender-variant people are probably a very small consumer group).
I’m just a soft butch, not trans in anyway, but I’m 5 foot 3, 120 pounds. I wear boys husky jeans from Gap, and they’re great. I always have to hem them, but they’re baggy enough to fit my not-quite-male hips, and continue to be loose enough through the thighs. I love them.